The average length of an engagement is 14.5 months. Is it okay to be engaged much longer or shorter than that? Of course, some engagements are very short, sometimes just a month. Meanwhile a small percentage of the engagements last several years. There is no rule on how long your engagement should last before you get married. Here are a few things that you should consider when deciding the duration of your engagement.
Short engagements
The engagement is an agreement to be married. You will often be married within an agreed amount time after the proposal. A short engagement can be a good choice when you have to make a big decision after the wedding. For example, when you would like to have children or live together on the condition that you are married. Everyone would be extra excited about the big day. Many brides and grooms are happy that they have decided to marry as soon as possible. They experience less stress or pressure. Logical: they haven’t had years to worry or think about it.
In addition, many couples see disadvantages of a long lasting engagement. A longer engagement can result in declining involvement of the people around you. Furthermore, the enthusiasm may slowly fade, which would be a shame. In general. A short engagement period is a good choice for most couples. If you are really a perfectionist, you might be better off by taking a little longer. As it will be more likely that everything will go as planned and in accordance with your desired wishes. In the end – short engagements are very advisable for impatient couples that just cannot wait to get married, and it prevents a lot of frustration and stress.
Long engagements
There are countless reasons why you do not wish to rush your marriage straight after the engagement. If you are apart on a regular basis from each other, a longer engagement period can be very healthy. You both have time to get used to the fact that you will be spending the the rest of your life (hopefully) together while slowly getting to know each other thorough. But even if you are still in different stages of life, a long engagement time could be an opportunity. For example, when one of you is still studying and the other is already working. Or even when you both are still studying. It gives you the time to complete a certain phase before starting with a new adventure.
This way, you spread the highlights of your life over a longer period. That is an advantage because you can look forward to it and enjoy it for a longer time.
Prolonging the engagement time could also help to give you the ‘ultimate’ wedding feeling. This period is a big part of the wedding therefore you could better enjoy it as long as possible. And maybe you are planning an engagement party? Then better don’t do that right before the wedding. During the engagement time, it may also be beneficial to remain living separately. This way you have more time to develop your own personality further before sharing your life forever and always.
Whether you opt for a short or long engagement, do not forget to enjoy every moment of it. After all, ideally you only go once through this phase.