Giving money to a newlywed couple is by no means a new concept. For example, the bride and groom use a subtle symbol of an envelope at the bottom of the invitation. Maybe it is a little bit unromantic and against the rules of proper etiquette, but it happens more and more often. But how much money should you give at a wedding, exactly? That, and everything you want to know about the etiquette can be read in this article.
As said before, asking money from the guests during your wedding is not according to etiquette. Nevertheless, a lot of couples ask for money at their wedding instead of gifts. The reason that this is ‘rejected’ by the etiquette is the fact that there is literally a price tag attached to it. As a guest, you are more or less ‘obliged’ to make a donation. Giving money at a wedding is a relic of using a dowry. However, these times are long gone.
How much money do you give exactly?
The amounts below are guidelines. There is no minimum or maximum. Do not let yourself be forced to give a large sum of money, if you can’t afford it. Give the bride and groom what you can miss.
Guidelines
- To colleagues, acquaintances, distant relatives; such as (second) cousin and nieces: you give around thirty dollars.
- To friends or less distant family, or family you speak to more frequently: you give sixty dollars.
- To direct family, such as brothers/sisters or close friends and people with whom you have a special bond: it is customary to give a hundred dollars or more.
How do you give the money?
Because giving money is not really seen as something tasteful (according to etiquette), it is best to give the money anonymously. This prevents the couple from adjusting the degree of gratitude and enthusiasm to the level of the amount they receive. You could also make a beautiful envelope box in which you can put the money.
Did you ask for money as a gift from the guests? And how did you handle that?